the turtleneck sweater

Last week, I decided to put on my favorite black cashmere turtleneck sweater. I was about to head into my studio and remembered I'd forgotten to turn the heat up, so I knew it was going to be chilly in there for the first hour or so.

This is a sweater I've had for years that bought at Lord & Taylor in downtown Chicago. And I wore it a lot. I think it was even part of my wedding rehearsal outfit almost 12 years ago.

But I haven't worn it in years because sometime in the last 12 years, Stacy and Clinton of "What Not To Wear" (and probably other articles I read in "women's magazines" when I used to read "women's magazines") convinced me that my body type and turtleneck sweaters were not friends. Something about how my boobs and my waist and my neck would all blur into a lumpy mess. I should focus on scoop necks. And it is true, scoop necks do look good on me, especially because I wear a bra that fits (insert quick digression where I gently suggest you go to Nordstrom to get fitted for a bra that is your size honey. please give yourself this gift).

I got rid of all my other turtlenecks, including a favorite favorite favorite chenille sweater that was just like my friend Virginia's that she let me borrow on the morning after a crazy night out when we lived in Chicago and my mom was driving up for a girls' shopping day and I overslept at Virginia and Rebecca's and wasn't at my own apartment and my mom thought I was dead when I didn't answer the buzzer and she left about 10 voicemails where she's yelling into the phone "ARE YOU THERE???" and when I woke up I quickly showered and put on V's sweater and my jeans from the night before and some of Rebecca's perfume and took a cab to my own apartment and apologized to my mom because I'd never done anything like that before even though dude I was 23. Thank god for cell phones so when Ellie does this to me she can just text and say, "In the morning, can you just swing by my friend's place and pick me up because I'm sleeping over here tonight?" And I'll wake up at 3:30 when the phone goes off and thank the angels for helping her make smart decisions in not trying to get home on her own when she shouldn't and text back "yep. love you."

Anyway, I kept the soft black turtleneck sweater and moved it around my room from time to time until I found it again on top of my sweater pile last Friday.

And then here's what I did. I put on my current favorite lipstick (in butternut) and stood out in our messy living room and held out my iphone camera and turned until I found some decent light (just like my friend Viv taught me) and snapped a photo. Because of the messiness around me, I clicked a black and white filter and posted this photo with these words:

Years ago, Stacy and Clinton convinced me my body type can't wear turtlenecks, but I've kept this cashmere turtleneck sweater I bought at Lord & Taylor in the late 90s in Chicago because it was my first cashmere purchase with money I made in my real job after college. Today I set down that old story and look you in the eye and say, "Yes, I have a double chin and I'm still going to wear what makes me feel beautiful and full of light and love."

Of course I'm aware that in this photo you can't see my double chin because the sweater and the angle I took the photo hide it. But I have one and sometimes it really distracts me from feeling beautiful. And I cringe when I see certain photos from the side when my double chin is really more like a really big neck because I eat too much cheese and ice cream. I seldom post photos from the side because I don't want to look at this part of me and I really don't want you to look at it.

During the last ten years, I've come to a place of love for my body and all that it helps me do each day. I've found clothes that fit and make me happy. I take self-portraits to help myself feel deeply seen by me, the one person who deeply knows where I've been. I dance and do yoga and let my body do what it loves. And I've marveled at how this body grew a human and lived to tell the story.

But that doesn't mean that I don't get tripped up in the old stories from time to time or that I don't think about what some people might be thinking when they look at a body my size.

Moments like the one I captured above, where I remember one of those old stories and make the choice to set it down, become a powerful step toward continuing to love this body of mine. 

Turtleneck sweaters that make me very happy are now back in rotation baby!

I hope you can set one of your own stories down today.

Much love,
Liz 

PS If you're in a place where you need to find a softer self-talk and look at yourself with more love and kindness, I highly recommend Vivienne McMaster's class Be Your Own Beloved. It starts tomorrow and it will change your life (for real).

a sea glass altar

the sea glass altar

Adorned with pearls and gemstones, this necklace includes a locket that holds a handful of sea glass Ellie and I found at North Beach in Port Townsend, Washington. This is one of my new favorite offerings from the Where the Forest Meets the Sea Collection. I think of it like a wearable altar because the locket is thick enough that it can hold sacred treasures that you want to carry with you, so you can put a small feather or note or other treasure inside it right next to the sea glass.

I chose these pearls to connect you to the sea, several sizes and shapes of aquamarine to connect you to the courage and peace within you, and kyanite is included to support you in speaking your truth when you need to.

There's just one available right now, but when it sells out, if you'd like me to create a custom sea glass altar necklace for you, I'm happy to make one. Just get in touch.

A few lines from the essay I wrote that inspires the pieces I add to this collection:

I come to the sea to let go of what no longer serves me as I ask her to take pieces of grief and all that will not be out with the tide. I imagine all of it tumbling with shell fragments and driftwood until it entwines with the seaweed that sways farther than I can see.

I come to the sea to remember me…

You can find the sea glass altar necklace and others from this collection in my new shop.

sometimes the day starts upside down.

Yesterday: There's a lot that did not go well in the last 35 minutes of getting them out the door for school. But because we were running late, we had this "LOOK! It's a beautiful pink sky Mama" moment standing under the trees in our front yard. 

Sometimes the day starts upside down. Sometimes you say "hurry up" about 25 times more than you wish you had. Sometimes you want to put the words back into your mouth. Sometimes you wonder if this is really your life.

But then beauty arrives and your little one stops to make sure you all notice and you are reminded: You're doing something right. 

You push yourself to remember that most days aren't this hard. Most mornings are have more ease and laughter than pushing and pulling. And you choose to open your heart to kindness and love. 

Toward yourself.

Toward those you love.

Toward the woman who will experience other upside down mornings in the days to come.

Because each day you choose.

Yes.

grand opening celebration

I'm so excited to share that the Soul Mantras have a new home: www.soulmantras.com! 

Everything about this new site makes me so happy! The photos are big! It is easy to navigate to other sections of the shop and see all the bracelets at once and then all the earrings and the stickers and the pocket talismans. And customizing your Soul Mantra is now so easy. I'm seriously in love.

In the Limited Edition section, you'll see a handful of new necklaces from the Where the Forest Meets the Sea Collection, which is full of pieces that remind me of my adventures along the Pacific Northwest coast. And after lots of requests, there's also a new layered listing from the 1993 Collection.

To celebrate this grand opening, all orders placed today on the new site, Monday, October 27, will receive a free pocket talisman (up until midnight PST tonight). No coupon code needed for the talisman. I'll just choose one for you and wrap it up with love and slip it in with your order. 

Thank you so much for your continued support of my shop! My Etsy shop will remain open at least through the holidays and the first few months of next year, but any new items and new collections will be listed on the new website. This feels like such a huge move for me and I'm so grateful to be able to celebrate with you!

Blessings and light,
Liz 

and then something exquisite happens

Staying open to the joy, to the beauty, is a practice I turn to again and again. Especially on the days it rains or my Facebook stream is full of heaviness or I'm grumpy or it really feels like the impossible is in front of me. 

Today, try to open yourself up to noticing the joy that crosses your path. You might even want to make a list of the joy you find.

It will change you. For real.

xoxo,
Liz 

she's all her.

The questions about "who does she look like?" and "who is she like?" come up from time to time. Watching her at the fair last month, I just kept thinking about how she is such her own person. So brave. So ready for adventure. So ready to laugh as she spins and dances and twirls in this world. So ready to say how she feels and what she wants and what she doesn't like. So ready to just be herself.

Jon and I are more of the "let's sit down and read or just be quiet" kind of people. Well, I'm more of the "let's sit down and solve the world problems and laught a lot" kind. Neither one of us has ever been much for climbing and spinning and sliding down the tallest slides ever. Nope. And we both have histories of keeping our wants inside, not wanting to rock the boat.

And then there's Ellie. 

She is teaching us every day with her wild, stubborn, brave, light-filled ways. 

She is awesome.

(And I finally caught them both with their dimples. Yep. In that photo she looks like her daddy.)

pinned it. did it. {with doña}

Doña has done it again with another fun Pinned it. Did it. post! Love this idea. I can think of about three skirts I'd like to do this with and make some fun new dresses for Ellie. And her time-saving hemming tip might have just changed. my. life. Read on...

***** 

Recently a friend told me about the horrendous bridesmaid dress she refashioned for her daughter into something cute and actually reasonable to wear. If I recall correctly, the process involved removing the bodice, turning it backwards, reworking the waist pieces into a folded collar and changing the length of the skirt.

I was impressed. I love the idea of re-fashioning clothes (and hope someday to take a class from the talented Emily Falconbridge on this topic), but I just can’t seem to imagine how to take apart an item of clothing and see it as something else. Let alone make it.

So I was pretty proud of my accomplishment this month, turning one of my old skirts into a dress for my preschooler. 
 

Mind you, this is a very simple re-fashion, but it gave me more confidence to try other things. 

I bought this skirt back when I was pregnant, while visiting my grandparents in Canada, both of whom have since passed. Honestly, it never looked good on me and I don’t really know why I bought it. But I did like the fabric pattern and because of the connection to my grandparents it has hung around through several closet purges. But I knew I wasn’t ever going to wear it. One day I realized that skirt length on me equals dress length for my daughter – I could turn it into a dress!

I found a very simple pattern on Pinterest for a dress with about the same shape as the skirt panels, took some measurements, and started disassembling.

It turns out this skirt was quite well made, with French seams and lining. Taking it apart was the hardest and most time consuming part of the whole project!

Once I had the waistband off and the lining removed, I had to figure out how to shape the actual dress. The original skirt was made of six panels but I didn’t need that much width, so I removed two panels and sewed that side seam back together to make a narrower tube.

Then I followed the instructions and measurements to cut armholes and the neckline casing.

I recently made my first project from a Japanese pattern book, and I picked up an awesome tip. When you are pressing a hem or folding in and pressing a casing, mark an index card with the width you need for each fold and use it to turn and press the fabric. This is so much faster than the way I learned to do it way back in high school!

The old waistband piece turned out to be just long enough to make a nice tie, so I sewed the long edge together and threaded it through the top edge casings.

And that was it!

The final dress is a bit big for my daughter right now, but it should be perfect next summer, and may even fit another summer after that.

I could not for the life of me get a not-blurry picture of her in it, but she did ask me if she could get married in it, which I am happy to take as a complement of the highest order.

Have you ever taken apart a garment to make something else? I’d love to hear about it in the comments!

Doña Bumgarner is a writer, artist, mama and a craft project-collector from way back. She loves Pinterest and uses it to help solve a household dilemma at least once a week (see her “Pinned and Done,” Handmade Gifts, and What’s For Dinner boards). She lives in Santa Cruz with her partner, their little one and his almost grown one, and a collection of cats and chickens. She blogs at Nurtured Mama.

Registration for her popular 21 Days To A Peaceful Holiday class, designed to help you create a simpler, more intentional holiday season, is now open. You can read more and register here.

Note from Liz: Over here in my corner, I'm focusing on how to "use Pinterest for good." I really see it as a community of people trying to see the beauty and possibility in their lives. I'm continuing to add a few new features here on my blog inspired by or directly about Pinterest as a way to invite others to look for this beauty within a social media community. Connect with me on Pinterest here. Read other "Pinned it. Did it." columns here.

you can choose

One of my favorite guided meditations (or images to think about during yoga) is to notice the space that you create inside you as you breathe. You focus on the expansion of your breath on the inhale and see if you can notice that feeling of space inside you. Because the simple act of taking a breath with intention and noticing this space can be done at any time, it is one of my go-to practices. And then I like to finish this meditation thinking about how I choose what enters this space. I choose. Every single day.

I hope this practice can become one you slip into your soul care toolbox to pull out when you need it.